...Where's the Cream Filling?

wattup my faithful blog followers.

Nothing too earthshattering has been going on lately. My company basketball team is currently riding a 4 game winning streak, which is nice. Yesterday I won a ticket to a Bruins game in late February from my company as well. Our company owns a bunch of season tickets to all the Boston sports teams and occasionally raffles them off to employees. I guess it's a nice perk, though I'm not a huge hockey fan, to be quite honest.

My company also has something called "pod outings" where they give everyone in a certain group of the company $20 once a month to go out together and, ultimately, get shitfaced. It's really a great way to get to know the, often, downright strange people who you share a bulk of your life with. Before we hit a local bar, a colleague of mine attempted to eat 40 Twinkies is 30 minutes. It was quite the spectacle, to put it lightly. To heighten the drama, another co-worker started taking bets, with 29 Twinkies being the line. I bet $5 he'd go over. My gut told me he'd hit the wall, but I knew this guy had the heart of a champion, so I put my money on him to pull through.

As each Twinkie was unwrapped, the pile on the plate just kept growing. We had to expand to another plate. The contestant chose to stand for the duration of the event. The timer started and he was off. Armed with only two Solo cups of water, he grabbed for one after the other and downed them. Cream coating the edges of his mouth and parts of his shirt, he made it to double digits in approximately 7 minutes. The themes to Rocky and Top Gun, respectively, blared in the background over the shouts of encouragement from the crowd (actually just those who had bet on him).

At around Twinkie 21 he paused...

the crowd held their collective breaths.

He turned to a bag next to him and spit out a stream of yellow liquid. With only 22 minutes gone by it seemed all was over. He retreated to his corner of the ring to regroup and wallow in his humiliation. His supporters gathered around while others in the crowd shook their heads in disappointment. The judge ruled that, since it was not actual throw-up, but instead an expulsion of the Twinkie that he was attempting to eat, that he was not disqualified, yet would be assessed a one Twinkie penalty.

He returned to the table with renewed vigor. The crowd was loving it! Their hero had risen from the ashes for ONE LAST RUN AT GLORY! 9 Twinkies were placed on a platter-- the 9 he'd need to top 29. With still a solid cup of water at his disposal, he mowed through 3 more creamy, caked delicacies. Reaching for another, a look of fear and sadness crept across the man's face. Time seemed to slow as I realized that this seemingly invincible man, the man who I had supported since approximately 30 minutes prior when I had handed my asian bookie a crisp Abe Lincoln, the man who was a living idol to so many young children, would indeed succumb to a 1.5 oz moist dessert cake.

He turned his head and threw up again into the bag. It was over. A valiant effort, nonetheless. The final count was 25.5 Twinkies, or, according to CalorieKing online, 3825 calories. Not bad for an evening meal.

After that event, we all went to the nearby bar Crossroads and took full advantage of their 'buy a pitcher get a free large pizza. The pizza is surprisingly good... sometimes those deals either have really shitty beer, or really shitty pizza. My cousin Big James stopped by as well, which was nice.

all for now... onto the music. I do love a good mashup. This one may not be the greatest, but it's so frickin catchy. I been sangin it on the T to and from work. People around me seem to love it. I lip-synched it to a cute young lass I spotted from a distance, and she was naturally entranced by my skillz.

Anyways, here's a mashup of two current pop hits. OneRepublic's "Apologize" beat with J. Holiday's vocals from "Bed." Now, I am a fan of "Bed," and have been an even bigger fan ever since I learned that The-Dream is the one who wrote it.

J. Holiday and OneRepublic -- "Apologize in Bed"

Check out the story behind "Bed.":

"The track was considered for Chris Brown -- he thought it was his -- but it was my record and I decided to give it up to J. Holiday," The-Dream explained to Billboard.com. "Chris said the record won't be No. 1 unless he's on it. I bet someone $500,000 that it would go to No. 1 and I collected my money just last week."

Chris Brown's comments may have actually cost him his relationship with The-Dream, who said he plans to never work with the young singer again.

Seriously. The-Dream is just that much of a baller to bet someone half a mil on his skills with some no-name R&B singer and tell Chris "Can't Sing Worth Shit" Brown to go f himself. Dream also has another song he wrote for Holiday called "Suffocate." I gots to check that one out.

peece my people.