we tryin to stay alive

Not to seem all doom and gloom lately... but being the anniversary of 9/11 I figured, why not keep the sad motif a-rollin!?

This morning I waited for the bus and read about the anniversary of 9/11. I remember I was in my junior English class of highschool, taking a quiz on some reading I had not done. I was struggling to make up answers which could possibly be considered correct when my principal came over the intercom to deliver the news. THe class sat in awe and left once the class was over to go watch the news on some tvs which had been set up in the library. I was always a little miffed that my English teacher had GRADED those quizzes. Probably because I hadn't done the reading... but still, considering the circumstances in which we took them, you'd think she coulda let it slide for once.

I'm actually writing this as I do some overtime in one of the larger, more recognizable skyscrapers in Boston. Believe I had thoughts of horrible things happening. Sad but true...

Anyways, my mother emailed me a week or so ago with some sad news. You see, I have an uncle-- or rather a step-uncle as I consider him, seeing as he fathered none of my cousins and my aunt just married him 10 yrs ago or so and he has played no significant role in mine nor many of my close cousins' lives-- who recently overcame throat cancer. It was a pretty terrible ordeal he went through. The surgeons actually had to take tissue from his stomach to recreate the lining of his throat. Thus, his stomach became MUCH smaller and he didn't eat as much and thus lost a LOT of weight. He wasn't lookin too good, but the doctors took some tests and found out the cancer had finally left his body.

He slowly gained his strength back and was able to go golfing quite a bit with my father. He is a professor at the prestigious Philips Exeter Academy, and also was the coach of their golf team. Essentially, he could golf at the Portsmouth, NH course whenever he wanted for free. I even played with he and my father on one occasion. It is easily the most beautiful course I've ever walked. Sik.

Anyways, he went to the doctor a few weeks ago and was told that the cancer had come back. Not only that, but the doctor predicted that he only had two months to live.

I have a hard time imagining how I would react to being told that. It must have been an absolutely awful moment... to go from thinking you had beaten this horrible disease, to finding yourself with 60 days remaining in your life. Gotta be hard for the doctor too... sheeyit.

So my uncle, who I'm not very close to but still wish no harm upon, is faced with the often-hypothetical question of what you would do if you were told you had x amount of days to live.

He has already planned a trip out to Santa Fe, NM, which I hear is beautiful at this time of year. Other than that I am not sure.

He's a real interesting guy... just came into my life late and in very small doses. He was really well-liked by his students, which included my cousin, Big Sauce, who went to Exeter for a PG year before Bowdoin College. Interestingly enough, he even served as a character witness during the trial of John Forté, the member of the Refugee Camp who is currently in year 7 or 8 of a 14 year sentence for the trafficking of liquid cocaine... dayum. Not smart for a dude with such an education.

As I browsed YouTube, I forgot how awesome this music video and song was. I gotta say, Forté may very well have the best verse in the whole damn thang. I also can't help but notice how appropriate the title now seems...



'Clef looks so young!

The Fugees and Wyclef was the first rap I ever got into. I think his album "The Carnival" was my first rap CD...and its damn good. I think that's all I have to say about that.

Though it may sound cliché, try and live each day to its fullest... i know i often forget to.

until next time,
-- obbs